on a journey to salt island
Unconsciously the time passed fastly…leaved the kinds of memories in my life, whether it the sweet memories or the contrary….and now I have finished and graduated my studying in my beloved school SMAN I Yogyakarta. And I have looked for the best university for continuing my education, and I decided to go on my education to the capital of this country, Jakarta.
I still have been memorizing the event when I was enrolling my self in my beloved school, and the first time I was meeting with her, the girl who has been my sweetheart for one year more……… a girl who has an odd characteristic then another girls. She has enough beautiful for impressing the man to get her love, so do I, I do impressed to her behavior which show that she has a principle in her life, and that is the difference between her and another girls.
At that time I did not have the bravery to do something to her, although just introduction, I just stealing eyes from distance, but when the time of students orientation comes, those all was changing, my teacher, miss Tuty placed me in one club with her, and she appointed me to be the chief of first club when the division of students orientation clubs.
“Now…every body listen here, no voice except my voice, I would like to read the divisions of clubs, and each club content six persons. For shorten the time I would read directly the member of first club, the chief is Ronnie ramadhany, the member are johny Lou, Iroel z, Rany rohimah, Rara anggi, and the last is Nayla anggraini……..”She said loudly.
When her (nayla) name mentioned with Miss Tuty, my heart beat fastly and hardly, I can imagine my feeling at that time, between happy and worry, and I was nervous at that time. I try to calm my self while listening Miss Tuty read the continuation of the clubs. After Miss Tuty read the division of clubs, she ordered us to get meeting each club and introduce our selves each other.
“Well students…..now you get meeting with your clubs and the program is introduction each other and I hope to all chiefs of club to responsible” she said spiritly.
I as the leader of first club, I have the duty to guide my friends who become my members in this club, although my heart refuse it (become the leader), but this is the trust which given to me with my teacher. I guide my members to get the proper place for assembly, we take seat under the leafy tree.
“As we have known together that our program is introduction our selves, but I don’t know from what side I have to begin this program, perhaps some of you have suggestion?” I asked my friends. No one give suggestion,,,,,,,,,,,,, so I intended to go on to the main destination of this program. “Because no one of you has suggestion, I would begin this introduction from my self, how? is this fair? I asked my friends. “fair enough “they answered reluctantly. “ok, my name is Ronny Ramadhany…….and most of my old friends call me by Danny, I born in this beloved city, so I absolutely knew everything about this city, now your turn!” I appoint a girl who has the curly hairs.
“my name is nayla anggraini, my nick name nayla, and you may call me Nay…..I born in this city too, and……………..any thing else?” she said with soft voice.
After that happening, our friendship get closer than before, and I felt that I have found new some thing which I never find it before when she beside me, but I can’t describe it, I just felt that I have new particle in my soul, and she can be my inspiration in everything, specially in interaction with people, so that I always try to be beside her everywhere. I passed my first grade happily because I can be her best friend, but I can’t keep my feeling to her, till in a day I forced my self to tell her about my feeling.
“Nay………may I say something about you? But after you heard it, I hope you don’t angry to me and avoid me”
“Of course you may do it…..feel free to do it”
“Nay I was very fortunate having friend like you, you are so smart, patient and of course beautiful, and all the time, I have something in my heart which I guess it’s an ordinary thing for human being, but I didn’t have any bravery to tell it to you at that time…Nay..actually…since my first meeting with you I have……..”
“Stop…..don’t keep on your speaking…..” She said angrily
“Why nay? Why when I want to say honestly about my heart’s feeling to you. You always prevent me to tell it without reason, why nay? Anything wrong with my feeling? Or I was too free saying that I was admiring you? Answer please?” I said while she was crying,
“Nay you have to know that I amn’t admire you, but I adore you and I am willingly sacrifice my body and soul, I want to be your sweetheart who can protect you every time, when you was in sadness and happiness…….nay..Please answer! I want everything be clear…don’t make me confuse!” I said hopelessly. I was waiting her further answering anxiously, I afraid she will refuse my love, because she just crying without saying any word, till she say her heart feeling wholly.
“Ron…..I beg your pardon if all the time I never give you chance to express your feeling, but it doesn’t mean that I hated you, I just don’t want to know your honesty, because it can hurt me. Actually….I knew your heart’s feeling to me, since I was knowing you at first time, I knew it from your interaction me, how you treat me, you always accompany me in sadness and sorrow, you always spare your spare time with me, you always ready when I need you, till I felt that you was very precious in my heart, your attendance in my life was change my sorrow life, so that, when you want to express your felling I always prevent you, because I don’t want to hurt your heart, I don’t want you avoid me, caused my reality that I have………..”She stopped her speaking while crying.
“What did you have Nay? tell me please! I need your explanation Nay.”I forced her.
“But I afraid you will be angry and hate me” She said unsurely.
“ Nay please believe me……I will accept whatever your answering, even it will hurt me, and I promise to you, I will be in your side when you need me” I said surely.
“Ok….if you forced me to tell it. I will tell it. Actually I want to tell this secret since I knew you, but I don’t have any heart to say it, to say that I……….”she stopped her speaking while stare me deeply. “I have a fiancé……..”She said by bowing her head.
I don know what must I do at that time……I just keep silence without saying a word. So do her, she just keep silence. I let my mind fly any where, imagine something which was happening in my life. Till nayla’s voice broke my imagination.
“Ron…..you have promised to me just now, that you willn’t angry to me and avoid me, and I do hope, you will prove your promise and forget my speaking just now.” She said hopefully.
Now I have new spirit in my life, I stimulate my self to be the best in everything for her…. I want to become her best friend. Even I can’t own her … but I still want to make her happy…. because I thought. That it was the real mean of true love…..and I convince my self that someday I can get her……. getting her love.
I passed my second grade of senior high school happily….. I got so many experiences in my studying and my fellowship with her…..and our fellowship closer than last year…..not just our class which same ……but now we take seat at the same place, and I always communicate with her, because I sure that by communication I can keep my friendship with her, and I though that this way was the best way for getting my aim, we always come together anywhere, I always be ready when she need me, on the contrary, she always be ready when I need her, we give and take each other, and just right our house direction was same, so in the morning I pick up her to her house, and in the mid day, I take her home, it’s began when I got a motorcycle as my birthday’s prize from my father, so since that time, I go to school by riding motorcycle, and from that custom, I knew her family, because sometime I drop in to her house, so do her, I invite her to my house and introduce her to my family. Step by step but sure, I look for everything about her life, looking for something which loved and hated with her, even I ever ask about it to her mother, till I know every thing about her custom and her background. And when she come in my home, she always have chat with my mother about every thing including about me, she almost know every thing about my life, but I thought that it was ordinary, because she was a woman who can socialize easily with whoever, specially with the woman. So…by these all, she more opened to me in every thing which happened in her life, she always share everything to me, although it’s very secret for her as a girl, there wasn’t gauche words between us, and I felt very comfortable beside her…..but I don’t know her feeling to me……did she feel what I feel? But if I guess, she has the same feeling to me, it’s known by her behavior to me, she seem rather spoilt to me, and I felt that she was my little sister.
# # # # #
On a day, she was telling me something which I thought that it was very private for her, something which since along time I eager to know it, and it was about her fiancé. Actually I wanted to know it since one year ago, when she was giving me the answering of my heart’s feeling, but I didn’t have any bravery to do it, because I was afraid, she will angry if I ask it at that time, but now she tell me about it, indeed, this was something which never appear on my mind at all.
“Ron……… I want to share something to you, and I believe that all the time you want know about this, but you didn’t have any bravery to ask it to me …..” she said surely, “I want to tell you about my fiancé……Ron I apologize to you, because all the time I have been lying you “she said doubly. And I was very angry at that time, because I do dislike someone who tells something lie.
“What do you mean nay? I don’t get what you mean” I said angrily while restrain my desire.
“Actually………. I don’t have a fiancé” she said by bowing her head.
“But why were you laying me at that time? Didn’t you believe me? Or didn’t you love me?” I asked her.
“Really…I didn’t mean to tell you lie, but the situation which was forcing me to doing it, and I wasn’t having any choice at that time, and I……….”
“Certainly I understood what you meant, you did it because you dislike me, you don’t love me, but remember please nay…..I do dislike to someone who tell something lie, and I really regard someone who tell something honestly, even it will be very hurt for me, than someone who tell the happiness but it false” I said angrily.
“Ron…. Please give me opportunity to explain further, don’t interrupt my speaking! I did it, not because I dislike and hate you, honestly I do love you since our first meeting till this time and forever, but why was I telling you lie at that time? Because I still couldn’t forget my bed memory with a boy who I thought that it was difficult to do, so that, I still have bed assumptions to men at that time……And why I tell this to you now? Because I do believe you, I believe that you weren’t same with another man. And if you willing to give me the second chance for being your sweetheart, I will thankful, Ron forgives me please? And as the prove of my apology to you, I willingly become your sweetheart” she said surely.
I don’t know what must I say to her at that time, I don’t find the suitable sentences, I so confuse…..I have reprimanded her, but she has told me something which I waited since along time. The silence surrounded us, no voice between me and her, I was just hearing the bird sings the beautiful song. I am still looking for the right answer to said, and I believe, she waits my answer too……and finally I find a simple word.
“Nay……… thanks for your belief to me, although I was doubt to you, but you still believe me to be your special boy friend, and I apologize if I was rather angry to you” I said nervously.
“Not at all” she answered simply while showing her sweet smile. At that time, I felt that this world just mine and her, I felt that the sky and all contents smile to us by sweetest smile, and I will remember this event forever, the sweetest event on March………… What a pleasure day! I can reach my dream become her steady, and I determined to give the best for her, and I will endeavor to don’t make her disappoint to me by dedicating my soul and all my own powers for her, as the shape or prove of my love to her, the love which will never dies forever and will be eternal in my heart after my love to my God, and now my love has perched on her heart, she accepted it from the bottom of her heart, and I promise to my self to always water my love, because love is like a plant, if we always water it continually, it will grow and won’t die. And no wonder that Imam Ghozali defined love as the best medicine for every disease which ever found with him, even one of well-known scientist ever said that love is the big gravitation in this earth, it was very right, by love I can conquer everything which hinder my life, I can face this life confidently. I remember that just now, she has said that she wanted to tell me about her bed memory with a boy, but seemingly she forgot it, and it made me so curious, I do want to know it.
“Nay you have said just now that you would tell me about your bed memory with a boy, if you don’t mind, I want to know it” I said hopefully.
“What for you know it? It isn’t so important to you, the important one is you have to console me and make me always happy” she said while staring me.
“Who said that it wasn’t important? And I think, it will help me in interaction with you, and I do hope from that’s story I can get so many way……and so many reflection, how to make you happy? How must I treat you? Because I don’t want to make you disappoint to me” I said further.
“ Ron…..today was the historical day for me and for you, so that, I don’t want to litter this nice day with my bed memory with a boy, so…… don’t force me to do it! Now I want to try to walk on my new life beside you, and do you want to see me in sadness anymore?” she asked me.
“Certainly I don’t want it honey” I said warmly.
The noisy which caused by the passengers of the bus which will bring me to the capital of this country, Jakarta, breaks my sleep, I aware that I have dreamt of her, my sweetheart who leaved with me in my birth land. And I do believe that she was the right girl for me, I promise in my heart to her to keep my love for her, to keep my pure love till I back to my home land.
Although the distance separated us
My true love just for you alone
Nobody else in my heart, except you……..forever
And my wish for you……
Keep your love to me
And I will keep my love to you too
Wait me honey………….
Wait me in dream beach
And we will sail together in one boat…….forever
Till we arrive in dream island.